You Are a Soul

As a pre-teen & teenager I used to connect with many song,

Modern day “psalms” of a hole in me, a void, an encompassing darkness.

Only a few years later I can still connect with these songs on a deeper and less angst filled level,

More healthy, understanding, & at times laughably.

To think I used declare these things over myself naively,

And then wonder why I was left feeling so miserably.

 

I say the word declare, not to sound clever

But to instill how much power there is in a breathe of air.

Words can be more piercing than a bullet,

With words there are no blanks, there is always meaning.

It’s the difference between watching an explosion and being in it,

One affects you mostly in a mental way while the other affects your whole being.

 

So be careful not only in what you do, but also in what you say.

For it could bring life or death any time of day.

 

So as I live my life for God,

I want to make it clear I don’t just do it to save my soul.

For this is a gift that comes with knowing my author,

My life is His both for me to know being whole & for His joy to come forth.

Team “me” has had many games and really no victories,

But there’s victory to be found in teamwork and interdependency.

 

Interdependence isn’t just a choice, it’s a need.

Sometimes we don’t see it, & in stubbornness we strive on our own until we bleed.

All who are hard and calloused,

Please soften soon.

It may not come with ease,

But you won’t regret it.

Listen to my pleas not for my benefit,

But to bring some understanding and ease

To your life that is controlled by good intentions and busy deeds.

 

PEACE.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————–

“You don’t have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.” C.S. Lewis (the quote behind the title)

 

Why do you Love me?

The Beatles lied, love is not all you need!

Indeed love isn’t all you need, even the fab four found that out when one of their own’s “love” led to their supposed end.

While it may not be all we need though, we don’t need a song to say we need love.

You can see it, hear it, smell it, taste it, and feel it. Love is missing, at least real love that is.

 

“Love” through gifts we’ve got, Love through physical affection we have mastered, Love unrequited is a profession.

But where is it, where is real LOVE?

Does love come in a nicely wrapped package, or simply holding someone close?

While one is sometimes more accepted & preferred, the interaction between two souls I think is what defines.

 

Acknowledgement and a kind word can mean the world,

No amount of wrapping paper unfurled can do the same.

We could say the only reason that people don’t know love is because of lack in trust or confidence,

But I’m sick of the redundancy.

Maybe if we spoke to people we aren’t always comfortable with, or kept our word

Love might actually become visible, like something possible.

But in this mess of words is the whole point.

Love is not a thing,

Love is an action!

Not a TRANSaction,

ACTION.

 

In this action comes choice, but it doesn’t always need a voice.

Sometimes the most loving thing is to be quiet, silence really can be glorious.

This choice though, at the end of it all, must be made in the interest of the other person.

It must be done carefully and truthfully, consistently & completely.

Anything less is what we already know, & look at how things are going.

 

Should love really have to be a commandment for us to do it,

Or should we love simply out of choice?

Yes, maybe love isn’t always comfortable or easy but does that mean we should stop?

The question shouldn’t be, Why do you love me?

If at all, the question that should be asked is why don’t you?

————————————————————————————————————————————————-

I was asked this question tonight by a friend of mine named “Dynamite Dave”. He’s a gentleman I met on State Street who has definitely had better days, but things are looking good for him. Ever since I met him a few weeks ago I had been praying for him and I truly hope that the place he told me he’s staying at stays consistent. Our connection simply started from me giving him a quarter and the rest of sandwich I had, I then mostly listened but conversed a little with him for about an hour. Today as we met again he thanked me for simply acknowledging him, in fact he even had me sit on his lap as I prayed for him. At first inside I thought I should be uncomfortable about this, but I wasn’t. He even asked if I was, but as I chuckled I honestly replied “no, just surprised.” This gift of being acknowledged is a mutual blessing. Next time you talk with someone, pay attention. Don’t just formulate your response, and wait enthusiastically to hear your own voice. In fact, attempt to converse even with people that you know might dominate the conversation every now and then. Being listened to is as important if not more than being heard.

Manipulation will eventually cause no conversation

From the basement to the rooftop, I could howl all night long.

GOD! SPEAK TO ME, WHY THE HECK AREN’T YOU SAYING ANYTHING YET!

SPEAK UP ALREADY, CAN YOU HONESTLY NOT HEAR ME, EVEN MY NEIGHBORS CAN HEAR ME!

GOD, ANSWER ME!

…Maybe He’s not answering because you don’t really want the answer?

“But I’m asking for it, so obviously I want it.”

Well it’s not that simple see.

If it were that simple Christ could have probably, in fact I’m going to say it’s practically guaranteed,

Passed on hanging dead from a tree for ungrateful people that He still loves desperately.

Truth is that the truth hurts,

The answers we’re asking for we don’t always want.

So when we’re having our moment with God, throwing a tantrum like the children we are.

Ask yourself, am I really wanting God’s answer or only what I want Him to say?

Am I really ready to listen, or only wanting sugar coated wax in my ears?

Even if you discover you’ve manipulated the words of our Father and Creator,

Don’t be ashamed or condemned.

You are not alone.

While operating alone has been proven to be terrible, we still push along on our own.

Don’t let the weight of your conviction bring you to ground,

Unless in this position of bended knees you are brought to repentance.

Admit your wrongs to God and you’ll see,

His eagerness and love to communicate with you never left or ceased.

In fact because of your honesty,

This desire has only increased.

So get ready sons and daughters of God almighty,

Because when you’re ready He’s been waiting.

The treasures of your life aren’t hidden,

They’re being uncovered and now it’s time for a lesson in patient reception.

Yes, God loves to reveal but in a timely manner.

So please don’t break down into old habits of demanding God’s favor,

Let Him pour His love on you and enjoy the honor of bringing your Father pleasure.

———————————————————————————————————————————————–

“Hear me as I pray, O Lord. Be merciful and answer me! My heart has heard you say, Come talk with me.

And my heart responds, “Lord I am coming.” Psalm 27:7-8 NLT Blessings

Listening is important in all relationships, remember our mouths open and close for a reason. Don’t let your voice being lost be the only reason you’re quiet. Value each voice you’ll ever hear, it’s a hard but worthwhile choice.

The Living Room: Home on the move

While I’d love a consistent place to rest,

It’s the “living room” of a cafe I like best.

Surrounded by strangers, acquaintances, & occasionally friends

Somehow I’m more comfortable here than at “home”.

 

Beverages & food of both normal & unique design,

Opportunities for great silence & conversation so divine.

I feel a part of the situation as much as I’m an observer of the atmosphere.

For once while in a sense alone, loneliness hasn’t crept in with angry fervor.

 

In my living room, the cafe away from home.

I often find I’m welcome & don’t feel alone.

Some day though when this cafe is gone & I’ve moved on,

I hope to find this comfort & welcome in a home of my own.

The Quiet Place: Enjoy The Silence

Being that I’m from the city, the deafening sound of police sirens and hum of airplanes are my urban lullaby.

The thump of an amplified speaker at a house party soothes me to sleep.

But every now and then I need solitude to keep sane,

I sit in this place and find a glimpse of what I think is peace.

In this state of peace though, I’m still a man on the brink.

Heart rate accelerated, mind drowning in an ocean of apathy, and blurred vision.

Is this really peace, or just disillusionment?

Am I moving forward or has my life’s pace become automatic?

My enemy isn’t only spiritually attacking me, but mentally.

For my mind is so used to the constant pace of monotony,

That I don’t know how to handle “peace” consciously.

Having a moment of life to simply look ahead of me and breathe,

Not contemplate, plan, or receive but just breathe.

So simple, but so hard to believe.

While the lies that formed my “life” once convinced,

I no longer believe it’s okay to go on accepting misunderstanding.

For I not only know I can find it, but I finally feel I deserve to know peace.

But this discovery comes not because of any work load completed,

For my only qualification is the sanctified grace that paid all the debt for me.

For in my heart and soul salvation has come a life that will know Peace.

———————————————————————————————————————————————–

Enjoy diversity, if you come from a loud environment find yourself in the quiet as well as the opposite (quiet environment, find yourself in a more noisy/loud place). Differences aren’t meant to divide or be disliked, but to be treasured and valued.

“For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God;  not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.” Ephesians 2:8-10 NASB

Glorious King

As I look in the mirror much like after a fight,

I somehow still feel the racing heart of a marathon runner.

How is it I feel such energy in the midst of exhaustion?

In a hall of voices, my only present companion is the reverberation.

Yet as I feel the warmth inside me, and the hand of comfort on my shoulder I’m reminded this isn’t true.

While I may not be welcomed excitedly to a banquet hall,

I’ve reached out and felt the grip of the only hands strong enough to keep me from the fall.

In times of embarrassment, degradation, lies, & fear

I’m free to be me.

I’m even free to shed a tear.

Not because it will cause attention or make some emotional memory,

But because I don’t need to be bound by chains that I unknowingly chose to clamp upon me.

While self-imprisonment is both worthless & hard to break from, the Helper is HE!

Who is He, the only flesh born king willing to live among the least of these?

Who was He, both God and man walking the earth and dying for all who will ever exist?

By his scars and the hem of his garment, multitudes were healed.

By his breath and unique touch, we know beauty and life.

This man has no equals, for his peers are nonexistent.

Why even the deaf can hear him, and the blind see.

Yet the world so blindly says He never existed, or was just big talk and liar.

But I don’t care what the world says, if there is any proof of his existence

It’s the fact we have a chance at redemption and that’s plenty of proof for me.

Who is this King of Glory?

Jesus Christ, the Lord God is HE!

—————————————————————————————————————————————————-

Psalm 46 NLT-“God is our refuge and strength,
always ready to help in times of trouble.
So we will not fear when earthquakes come
and the mountains crumble into the sea.
Let the oceans roar and foam.
Let the mountains tremble as the waters surge!

A river brings joy to the city of our God,
the sacred home of the Most High.
God dwells in that city; it cannot be destroyed.
From the very break of day, God will protect it.
The nations are in chaos,
and their kingdoms crumble!
God’s voice thunders,
and the earth melts!
The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is here among us;
the God of Israel is our fortress.

Come, see the glorious works of the Lord:
See how he brings destruction upon the world.
He causes wars to end throughout the earth.
He breaks the bow and snaps the spear;
he burns the shields with fire.

10 “Be still, and know that I am God!
I will be honored by every nation.
I will be honored throughout the world.”

11 The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is here among us;

    the God of Israel is our fortress.”

Soul Surgery

I’m a skeleton finally getting some skin,

I’ve received life renewed inside & out

And no longer look as frightening as my sin.

The blood has covered me within,

For the cost I had has been paid & now it begins.

But is it really that simple, I just read page 1062 & Jesus’s blood washed my sins?

No, it’s not & wasn’t simple.

It was what was meant to happen, but it didn’t happen easily.

You see while Jesus is God, He in his love gave up his heavenly body for flesh similar to our own.

In his painful death sentence, He was fully man.

How would you like to have your hands pierced by nails to block of wood, for crimes you never committed?

How would you like to be spat upon and beaten beyond recognition, for having a heart for all who live?

This was the cost He paid for our lives, the same thing we wear around our neck as jewelry or some act of piety.

I bet when we wear our cross necklace, we don’t always realize how heavy a symbol we’re bearing.

We offer our bodies as sacrifices to elders of Captain Morgan & Jack D,

Get our high off grass so we don’t feel the pain as we fall from climbing trees.

Trees rooted in deceit, distrust, faithlessness, and lies stacked up ten feet.

The sadness in our withered trees is that these components are only the roots,

For hatred, isolation, withdrawal, & depression are just some of its “fruits”.

What I once thought was beauty being found in the breakdown,

As more is revealed I’m seeing there is beauty in the building process as well.

Unravel me that my dry and dead skin may never again be,

Help me move in my strong skin that light may shine both outside and within.

This isn’t a matter of learning or unlearning,

This is a time of discovery and curiosity.

There is freedom in not having all the answers,

As long you’re willing to admit it and seek understanding for the existing questions.

Just as one day ends and a new day begins,

The life once known and now past ends where the future begins.

Move into your future, your purpose with energy and freedom.

Our lack of control is for our good, but lack of discipline would be sin.

Where we are weak, He will supply strength unexpected.

And in the places we thought we’d never heal or fix, He will bring life and it won’t just be something you feel.

You will change throughout your whole being,

It will be somewhat of a rebirth because it will be the first clear time you’re seeing.

Submit unto the God of all not out of fear, laziness, or despair.

Submit unto the Father God of all in honor, awesome fear, & peace.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————–

“Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 NLT